Maintain Your Insanity

I got this as an email forward from my wife, and it really was good enough to post here.

20 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity (I’m thinking this
could get one arrested, actually.)

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and
   point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don’t Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want
   Fries with that.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It “In.”

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has
   Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write “For Smuggling
   Diamonds”

7. Finish All Your sentences with “In Accordance With The
   Prophecy.”

8. Don t use any punctuation

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat with a serious
    face.

11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is “To Go.”

12. Sing Along At The Opera

13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don’t Rhyme

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical
    Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance , Tell Your Friends You Can’t Attend
    Their Party Because You’re Not In The Mood.

16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name,
    Rock Bottom.

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream “I Won!, I Won!”

18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot,
    Yelling “Run For Your Lives, They’re Loose!!”

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner. “Due To The Economy, We Are
    Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.”

20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of
    Insanity…….Send This E-mail To Someone To Make Them Smile.

It’s Called Therapy.